If I was assigned this birthing person I would have a lot of reactions and feelings. I know that I would feel significantly more self aware of all my actions and words. I feel like I’d be more worried about offending them than cisgender straight couples. In all honesty, if I didn’t see the introduction, as Caitlin mentioned around the time stamp 3:16, I too would assume they are a straight couple with Caitlin being pregnant and Ari having increased adipose tissue around his abdominal region. Additionally, from a medical standpoint I feel like I’d have a lot of questions asking if he went through hormone replacement therapy because I don’t have enough background knowledge understanding how testerone would impact the physical process of being pregnant and giving birth. I know sometimes it can cause amenorrhea and vaginal atrophy. Yet, not all transgender men have gone through hormone replacement therapy so I guess that’s an assumption of mine as well. I know that I would have unintentional biases and have the best care at heart but I know I’d probably slip up out of habit for the large majority of other patients.
There are multiple methods you can use to promote inclusivity in teh healthcare setting. One of the easiest things to do is walking in, introducing yourself with your pronouns. At one point I’d ask patients their preferred pronouns, but my non-binary roommate this summer pointed out that it was a good start yet that their preferred pronouns are just their pronouns and don’t need the word “preferred”. Something simple the hospital could do is having a sign along the lines of “everyone is welcome here”. Though sometimes these signs may be cheesy I do actually feel more welcome and I bet other patients do as well. Another aspect of this is when I’m addressing the couple in the very beginning, being mindful of who I’m looking at so that it doesn’t look like I assumed who was who. It is important to ask the patient what concerns they have. I know that Ari mentioned the feeling of the nerves of the immediacy of telling their friends and family about the pregnancy. I think one thing to be mindful of is this added factor of stress and comforting the patient through this vulnerable time of the pregnancy and giving birth itself but also how to coach them through the vulnerable process of talking to their support system.
Using female specific language leaves out this entire group of people. What healthcare professional would I be if I wasn’t able to care for all patients? For example, we don’t use the exclusive language of people who have blue eyes. It’s just like any other characteristic that makes each individual who they are. One thing I thought was interesting was when Ari said something along the lines of “on the next push I could feel their head come out”. Ari used the pronoun “their” in reference to the couple’s baby. I feel that most couples I’ve seen would use he or she in reference to their child. That was something I noted to incorporate becoming more comfortable with using more gender neutral terminology when talking not only about pregnant people but also about children.